cur-mud-geon:
anyone who hates hypocrisy and pretense and has the temerity to say so; anyone with the habit of pointing out unpleasant facts in an engaging and humorous manner
Found in a Podiatrist’s office: “Time wounds all heels”
On a Septic Tank truck in Oregon: “Yesterday’s Meals on Wheels”
On another Septic Tank truck: “We’re #1 in the #2 business”
On a Plumber’s truck: “We repair what your husband fixed”
On another Plumber’s truck: “Don’t sleep with a drip…call your plumber”
On a Church’s Billboard: “Seven days without God makes one weak”
At a Tire Shop in Milwaukee: “Invite us to your next blowout”
On a Plastic Surgeon’s office door: “Hello…May We Pick Your Nose?”
At a Towing Company: “We don’t charge an arm and a leg…we want tows”
On an Electrician’s truck: “Let us remove your shorts”
On a Maternity Room door: “Push…Push…Push”
At an Optometrist’s office:
“If you don’t see what you’re looking for, you’ve come to the right place”
On a Taxidermist’s door: “We really know our stuff”
On a Fence: “Salesmen welcome! Dog food is expensive”
At a Car Dealership: “The best way to get back on your feet is to miss a car payment”
Outside a Muffler Shop: “No appointment necessary…we hear you coming”
In a Veterinarian’s Office: “Be back in five minutes. Sit! Stay!”
At the Electric Company: “We’d be delighted if you send in your payment. However, if you don’t, you will be.”
At a Propane Filling Station: “Thank heaven for little grills”
Note: All came from an e-mail I received a couple of days ago; no names will be mentioned to protect the less-than-innocent.
