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The Rambling Insomniac

Tom is a 25+ year resident of Germantown and the surrounding community. He currently lives in Hubertus with his wife and two small kids on a hobby farm near Bark Lake. Tom's blog will likely not save the world, but hopefully, you'll get some enjoyment from his ramblings.

April 2008 - Posts

The Popemobile

By Tom White
Thursday, Apr 17 2008, 01:25 PM
This week, Pope Benedict XVI is making a historic visit to the United States. It’s historic in the fact that Pope’s don’t come to America all that often, but when they do, the visit gets plenty of coverage.

I couldn’t help but notice he brought the Popemobile with him for the visit. I guess I have no problem with calling this thing “The Popemobile”, but I would think we could come up with a name that is a little bit more deserving for the Pontiff himself.

Seeing him being catered around in it got me to thinking about some things;

Does the Pope ever stop at a gas station and ask for directions? Or does the Popemobile have a GPS unit on-board. And if it does, does it speak in a monotone male voice chanting “Make a right turn at the next exit”.

Do cardinals at the Vatican ever say “Hey Benedict, I’m moving into a new congregation across town this weekend. Any chance I can borrow the Popemobile to move my stuff?”

Does the Popemobile have a vanity license plate that says something like “MY HLYNS”, or “BENE XVI”, or “ME VICAR”?

Is there one of those faux yellow road signs in the back window that says “Pontiff On Board”?

Are the cup-holders in the Popemobile customized to hold a chalice?

When they stop to fill the gas tank up, does the Pope grumble about the high gas prices?

When they change the oil on the Popemobile, does the used stuff come out as red wine?

If you live near the Vatican, would you ever see a used Popemobile on a used car lot?

Does the Popemobile have an air-freshener that smells like incense?

Are there any bumper stickers on the Popemobile? Like “I brake for mass”, or “I’m not speeding, I’m abdicating”, or “If this mobile is rocking, don’t bother knocking.”

Yikes, I just saw lightning strike outside. I’m just poking fun here, but I better quit while I’m ahead.

G’Night G’Town!

 

Monkey Bars

By Tom White
Wednesday, Apr 9 2008, 09:00 PM


Earlier this week, an Illinois delegate for Barrack Obama was asked to step down after making some comments to a couple of neighbor kids (view the story here). Turns out that the kids, who were black, were climbing on a neighbor’s magnolia tree. The now ex-delegate, has stated that she felt they were harming the tree, and that she worried they would actually harm themselves. She then made a comment to the kids that
the tree is not there for kids to be climbing on like “monkeys”. And for saying this, she lost her delegate position, and was issued a fine for disorderly conduct.

While I can certainly see how the use of the word “monkey” could be considered racist or politically incorrect in certain situations, I don’t believe this woman should have been chastised for what she said. I mean really, since when is calling a couple of kids climbing in a tree “monkeys” wrong? I call my kids monkeys all the time when they are climbing on stuff. It’s just a natural thing an adult would say to kids.

As I started thinking about this whole monkey comment situation, it made me realize that there are millions of things we say every day that could be considered politically incorrect, but only if taken in the wrong context. Are we safe to say these things….

Monkey bars
White-tailed deer
Snow White
Crackerjack
Yellow cake
Yellow-fin tuna
Chinese food
Black crappie
Black licorice
Blackened anything
Indian corn
Red beans and rice
Red wine
White wine
Polish sausage
German Potato salad
Vegetable tray
Blind Robins
Spanish rice

I think you get my point, and I’m sure you could easily add to this list.

Personally, I’m sick and tired of all the “politically correct” pressure that American society is putting on us. Will we soon be so afraid of what to not say that we won’t even talk to one another? C’mon Americans…lighten up and quit being so sensitive!

Summer will be here soon, and that means its time for fresh, sweet corn. I think we’ll all be safe to stop at a roadside stand and buy a dozen ears of “bicolor sweet corn”. Well maybe not, as I’m sure someone could find something wrong with even that.

G’Night G’Town

If we were to wake up some morning and find that everyone was the same race, creed and color, we would find some other causes for prejudice by noon.  ~George Aiken


 
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