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Kevin Fischer is an award-winning veteran broadcaster who has been seen and heard on Milwaukee TV and radio stations for nearly three decades.
Kevin, who is a legislative aide to state Sen. Mary Lazich (R-New Berlin), can be seen offering his views on the news on the public affairs program, “INTERchange,” on Milwaukee Public Television Channel 10. He lives with his wife, Jennifer, in Franklin.

Culinary no-no #24

By Kevin Fischer
Sunday, Oct 28 2007, 10:08 PM
Dear Mom,

 I am about to write my blog and tell all 6 of my readers about my latest culinary no-no.

You know. I write about some food taboo every Sunday.

I’m tired. I had a long week. (That whole state budget nonsense).

But you know how you always told me to be nice to the ladies.

There’s this nice gal who also writes a blog. I met her at a bloggers’ meeting. As nice as she is, I think she’s crazy. She claims she really likes these culinary no-no’s.

She might be on to something. When I post these goofy no-no’s, I get a whole lot more people checking in, like……..11 or 12 or…..well….. a whole bunch more. So, I’ve just got to write this no-no deal before I hit the sack.

And believe me, this has been an adventure of a day, what with the Mayor and Hulk Hogan and Barry Manilow all stopping at my door for trick or treat.

I guess I’m just writing to tell you that I want to thank you for never serving us the slop I’m going to write about in my next culinary no-no.

You’re the best Mom ever.

Love, Kevin


I just discovered this culinary no-no, even though it’s been around since the Depression era.

That’s close to 80 years ago.
 

Way back then, when so many Americans were poor, it was customary to take ordinary pasta and make spaghetti. 

A popular dish was called, “Japanese” spaghetti.

You’d take the pasta and toss in some butter.
 

But then came the sacrilege.

Instead of spaghetti sauce, cooks would throw…………..

I shudder at the thought………………………………………

ketchup on the noodles.

Are you kidding me?

I’m not picky at all when it comes to eating. This strikes me as something you’d be served in Waupun or Taycheedah.

Alright.

Pasta. Toss in some butter to jazz it up.

I understand that……….the more butter the better. (Hey, my cholesterol is perfect). But Heinz? Hunt’s?

Resorting to ketchup in the 30’s because you have no idea where the next dinner is coming from…………..I get that.
 

But here’s the puzzler.

People today are still eating this (Mom, I’m sorry) crap.

They remember eating it as kids.
 So the folks that endured the Depression, God bless them, have handed it down, and those folks have handed it down, and people today are not only eating it, they’re claiming they love it. 

Hello!!!!!!!

It’s not the Depression anymore.

Not even close. 

The poorest of the poor can still settle for Ragu.

Ketchup on spaghetti??

* WARNING: NAME-DROPPING ABOUT TO TRANSPIRE*
 

Try serving that to my dear friend, Mrs. Joseph Campione (Yes, that Campione) and if she wasn’t such a lovely refined lady, she might just spit in your face. 

On a side note, my wife and I have seen the Butoni sweet Italian sausage tortellini and any other number of Butoni products at the grocery store.

Problem:
 The tortellini has raisins in it. (No-no) 

And a lot of the Butoni products sound appetizing, but unfortunately the pasta is of the whole wheat variety (another no-no). 

Why, Butoni, why?

OK, back to ketchup on spaghetti.
 

It’s not the 1930’s anymore. Let’s get real. There’s no need to put Heinz on your pasta.

That’s not just a no-no.
 

It’s a mortal sin.


PREVIOUS CULINARY NO-NO’S

1) Ketchup on a brat
2) Green peppers on pizza
3) The dirty martini
4) Fruity brats
5) A Bloody Mary after dinner
6) Women “manning” the grill
7) Eating pizza at Festa Italiana, brats at German Fest, or tacos at Fiesta Mexicana. (Be adventurous. You can have those items anytime).
8) Eating a cream puff as though it was a hamburger.
9) Taking your own bottle of sauce when invited to a barbecue.
10) Touching the grill if you’re a guest at an outdoor barbecue.
11) Coaching the host on how to grill.
12) Some regional flavored ice cream…..like black licorice.
13) Taking the husks off before you grill corn on the cob
14) Being afraid to chill red wine
15) Pizza on the grill
16) When serving exotic or strange dishes to guests, do not tell them exactly what it is. Instead, use a more inviting term (caviar) rather than being blunt (fish eggs).
17) In late summer and early fall, this time of year, don’t buy zucchini. Somehow, someway, you will find zucchini or zucchini will find you.
18) Showing disrespect to your restaurant server.
19) Eating out on a Monday night.
20) Pumpkin beer.
21) Mail-order turkey.
22) Grilled cheese is just for kids.
23) Dining in the dark.

 

Comments

Karen   

I'm glad I clicked over here before shutting down the computer.  Once again, you did not disappoint.  

Reminds me of spagetti lunch in my elementary school cafeteria.  Yuck!

Now get some Zzzz's!

October 28, 2007 10:36 PM

dad29   

When are you going to get to Chili-With-Noodles?

REAL Chili does NOT have pasta tossed in, either while cooking, or afterwards.

October 29, 2007 9:28 AM

Betty   

ICK!!!

October 29, 2007 9:34 AM

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